Tour Countdown II: Europe Strikes Back

[DirtyMartini]

Today’s crap verse for all Copelandia
details an odd development of the summer;
more bizarre perhaps than the tour itself:
yes, it’s the Flag of that thar drummer.

This great green menace is a wonder,
if I do say so myself
(and if that damn wonder survives the tour,
one day it can live upon Stewart’s shelf).

Able to rally around their standard
(plus excitement more than a smidgeon),
the Tube Sock Army of Sacred Copelandia
have founded Flag Religion.

They’ve got t-shirts; they’ve got pledges;
they’ve got masses and concerts by the score.
As if the Three Blonde Heads weren’t godhead enough,
Stewart is no longer simply folklore;
he has become his very own savior.

(Seriously hardcore.)

Generosity, dedication, and passion
have all arisen for this Flag,
as have mania, frenzy, and psychosis,
and (I’d bet) stock prices for plastic bags.

Some folks physically shake to meet the Flag
because they are so devout.
Just knowing that Stewart has seen it,
many a Copelander has kinda freaked-out.

That Zeus Himself speaks to the flag
by pointing is quite insane.
Stewart, what kind of rock star are you
not to treat your minions with disdain?
(Were you absent that day in Celebrity School
when aesthetic distance was explained?)

When the tour began in Vancouver,
it was little more than cloth,
but today the Flag’s a phenomenon,
a veritable Thing, by my troth.

Though I do fear our little tribute
may at times turn Stingo wroth
as on more than one occasion,
he’s looked a wee pissed-off.

Stewart, please explain to Sting and Andy,
if you would at my behest:
the Flag shows not lack of love for them,
but that we love you best.

<*ducks quickly beneath the desk*>

Okay, okay -- I jest.
No need to make feel bad the rest.

So please explain that “favoritism”
per se is not what we suggest;
we are simply showing our support
with a pinch of fervor, a dash of zest,
for all the work you’ve done within
and without the Police songfest.

Besides, we’ll be showing Andy love
at the Garden at Challoween,
and Sting’s got a couple of castles
while all we’ve got is the Flag o’ Green.

Although the Flag does come backed by an army,
perhaps the loudest ever seen;
indeed a global network of Crusaders
fueled by fervor and caffeine,
marching to pounding polyrhythms,
rallied by slews of words obscene.

I may just be thinking aloud here, Stewart,
but say the word and your wife’s a queen;
the Magic Stingdom ain’t seen nothing
til it’s met Phaty the Machine.

As per always, Stewart, thank you.
And as per always, please don’t smite.
Just remember all this snark is
what gets the Flag to you each night.

Soon it will be flying ‘round new continents,
this One Flag for many nations;
I truly hope it remains a game to you
and never feels like obligation.

For we appreciate your work,
and we appreciate your eye
as it searches through the crowds
and at the Flag smiles a “hi.”

Greeting one person in the audience,
you greet all Copelanders thereby.

But of course, the first law of the Flag
is for the bloody thing to survive;
now that Soylent Green has cleared customs,
it will see you in Stockholm IN ONLY FIVE!!!

[Lynne]

Excellent .

[tonydrums]

Nice! I like the "green wonder" reference.

DM, you are the Emily Motherfu*%in' Dickinson of SC.net.

[DirtyMartini]

Emily Motherfucking Dickinson indeed! (Moeskido mentioned Lewis Fucking Carroll yesterday.) Tee hee.

[policefan]

DM, phenomenal!

[DirtyMartini]

Crap! I missed a reference earlier. Minor edit.


BTW, thanks, kids.

[samburusunset]

Magnificent as always, Kel.

[mardee]

[quote="DirtyMartini"]

As per always, Stewart, thank you.
And as per always, please don’t smite.
Just remember all this snark is
what gets the Flag to you each night.

[/quote]


I believe that a Wise Lady once told me "We snark the ones we love."

BTW, excellent prose, as always. You're outdoing yourself again.

[DirtyMartini]

[quote="mardee"]I believe that a Wise Lady once told me "We snark the ones we love." [/quote]

So wise, in fact, that she had to do a search to be sure it was she. Genius she be.

[mardee]

[quote="DirtyMartini"] Genius she be.[/quote]

Almost Yoda -like thinks I.

[DirtyMartini]

This weekend's verse need must be brief
as I am out of town;
so here's a quick limerick misquote
of Andy to mark the countdown:

There once was a band from Nantucket
who were more than a drop in the bucket.
In Sweden days four
they will wipe up the floor.
All those other small bands can tubesuck it.

[samburusunset]

A great twist on a classic !!!!

[smudge]

See, I pop in here, and DM has written several stanzas in honour (yes we add a pointless 'u' over here) of the flag, the tour, the man, and tube socks, and us. And to me, this is of course magnificent but totally normal.

Meanwhile, here in north east surrey, I'm having dinner with perfectly nice friends who have dealt admirably with being dragged to see my favourite songwriter (go to myspace and look for the whitlams - trust me it is worth it), and yet they look like people planning an intervention when I mention Green Glory.

And this above all else is making me feel 13 again. Why can't these people get EXCITED - I mean not necessarily about a bit of green cloth and Mr Copeland hitting things accompanied by andy and sting, but about, well, something other than bloody IKEA.

Grrr.

Rant over. Sorry.

kate

[kimmy]

Kate.....

I understand...... All I get.... all day is

I've just been playing my new anthology on my comp..... all nice and quiet and been told off!!! 'I can't hear the telly'

well poo!!!!!

It's okay though coz I hve have you guys who understand!!!

Roll on 2 weeks!!!!!


Kimmy

[TheEqualizer]

I was thinking that this thread meant that Europe had announced a tour to rival the Police.
ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWN!!!!!!!!
<hiding from IrishRose, who LOVES the band Europe>