OT: The we're-not-in-La-Jolla-and-need-a-distraction-thread

[smudge]

Moonstone, that is excellent advice. The greengages seem to be pretty tasty and will therefore be consumed. I'm grateful for the early warning on christmas though. I'm going to buy some tasteless plums tomorrow and partially freeze them in prep for carol-singer-season. Surely assault with a soft fruit is 'intent to wound' or 'affray'? GBH seems a bit harsh unless I sharpen the stone and deliver it from the barrel of a sawn-off!

I promise I won't buy random fruit while not under the influence again.

Anyhoo. What's everyone else up to? I've just had a pleasant ten minutes yelling at the radio about the world in general. Very therapeutic. Opening the wine now....

[shyvixen]

I've been distracting myself with the Daily-Mail-o-matic random headline generator:

http://www.qwghlm.co.uk/toys/dailymail/

Hysterically funny even if you're not from the U.K.!

WILL THE METRIC SYSTEM DESTROY THE QUEEN?

HAS FILTH ON TELEVISION GIVEN YOUR PETS SWINE FLU?

WILL RUSSELL BRAND GIVE THE CHURCH SWINE FLU?

I could do this all day and I probably will.

WILL FACEBOOK MAKE BRITAIN'S SWANS OBESE?

[smudge]

Ah the Daily Mail. If it weren't a newspaper, it would be funny

I'm borrowing one of those if that's ok Shy

[shyvixen]

[quote="smudge"]Ah the Daily Mail. If it weren't a newspaper, it would be funny

I'm borrowing one of those if that's ok Shy [/quote]

Absolutely! I really should stop and get back to work but I don't seem to be able to.

COULD FEMINISM HAVE SEX WITH THE QUEEN?

[smudge]

[quote="shyvixen"] I really should stop and get back to work but I don't seem to be able to.

COULD FEMINISM HAVE SEX WITH THE QUEEN?[/quote]

I foolishly clicked on your link. HAS BINGE DRINKING DESTROYED THE CONSERVATIVE PARTY?

I'm hooked. No sleep for me

ETA: Fellow brits of any political persuasion may enjoy the 'Michael Howard Sings The Smiths' link from the same page Shy flagged up. I'm guessing if you're a big Smiths fan it may be a little bit painful....

(IS FACEBOOK STEALING THE IDENTITY OF BRITAIN'S SWANS? - Blimey, that's a worry!)

[DirtyMartini]

HAS CHANNEL 4 GIVEN ENGLAND CANCER?

[smudge]

[quote="DirtyMartini"]HAS CHANNEL 4 GIVEN ENGLAND CANCER?[/quote]

Not sure about that, but - IS FEMINISM RUINING CLIFF RICHARD?

There's a grain of truth in that one, thankfully.

Current favourite: IS RIP-OFF BRITAIN GIVING THE MEMORY OF DIANA SWINE FLU?

[63falcon]

Am ignoring the feminism part of this.......will try to get some more decorating-the-"new"-apartment done (vintage & retro Danish modern)and then spend some sweet time w/ my sweet boyfriend tomorrow!! Got to spend a bit of last gasp before school starts time w/ the 2 boys I helped raise, teen years, very challenging at times!
Am glad the Nutters have made a strong showing for StewartHimself!

[sockii]

zomg i ate an obscene amount of food at the clambake today.

[GinaSuperCat]

hah, went to a baby shower, department party, dinner, and more...been drinking...So Daily Mail random generator is, of course, just my speed of humor about now <grin>

WILL HOODIES MOLEST BRITAIN'S FARMERS?

Hahaha <pees self>

[luddite lady]

Thank you shyv., I think. This Daily Mail thing certainly works better when mixed with alcohol.

IS THE HUMAN RIGHTS ACT TURNING OUR CHILDREN GAY?

Sadly, I know of a few publications that might print such a headline in all seriousness.

[Schmaffy]

WILL THE GERMANS MOLEST YOUR PENSION?

OMG. This is SO not the site for me. Like I need another distraction.

ETA: Seriously?

COULD GAYS KILL THE CONSERVATIVE PARTY?

EETA: I can't stop.

WILL LESBIANS GIVE THE BRITISH PEOPLE SWINE FLU?